Archive through January 25, 2014

[digger]

Looks to me like the sonsabitch can squeeze through some pretty tight spots!
Of course he's been doing that since 2008 hasn't he!

 

[aschumacher]

Guys, go back to the previous page and bounce him around using your cursor...lets out a bunch of frustration.

 

[aschumacher]

For all my beer drinking friends...
A Canadian beer drinking song.


This is a Canadian Beer commercial. Music and words all CANADIAN. Words are great.
Turn up the volume and enjoy it.

Bet you can't play it just once!
cid:C43F8ACF72314482AF1DED64F4AF3550@youra9279112e3

http://safeshare.tv/w/PKYPTOarUx

 

[fcurrier]

Bet you're right!

 

[aschumacher]

SPEAKING GERMAN IN TEXAS.

In Texas there's a small town called New Braunfels, where there's a large German-speaking population.



One day, some weeks ago, a local rancher driving down a country road noticed a man using his hand to drink water from the rancher's stock pond.



The rancher rolled down the window and shouted, "Mein Herr, trink das Wasser nicht. Die Kuehe haben da rein geschissen." This means: “Mister, don't drink the water. The cows have **** in it."



The man shouted back, "I'm from New York and just down here campaigning for Obama's health care plan. I can't understand you. Please speak in English."



The rancher replied, "Use both hands."

 

[wshytle]

This is more of a rant than anything. I called yesterday about filling a 100 lb LP tank. For two years now I've paid $87 but because of the shortage it now cost $175. That's just bullshit!

I talked with a salesman about the cost and he said they were getting what they could when they could. The US just sent a **** pot load of LP to China too. Ain't that special??????

I realize the northeast and other parts have had a bad winter but doesn't it get cold EVERY WINTER??? How the hell do they prepare for cold in those areas???

Now I might be freezing my ass off because of greed, exports, and political corruption.

I do have plenty of wood and I'm thankful but I'm beginning to wonder how and when they plan to come take that or tax it or something.

 

[kide]

Wayne:
From what I've read, the shortage up North is because of a refinery shutdown, a pipeline shut down and the "harsh" winter.. So why did the local LP supplier here in ZephyrHills Florida just pay $10,000 more for his last load of gas (he gets between two and three a week)?? Good 'ol supply and demand......

 

[aschumacher]

Another Gun Incident...

A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his model 1911 Colt .45 caliber pistol
with an 8 shot clip, and yelled, "Who in here has been screwing my wife?"


A voice from the back of the bar yelled back, "You need more ammo."

 

[fcurrier]

If ya hafta go to the woodshed this might be the one to be taken to.

 

[jbaker]

Now we know why Frank does not get any work done when out at the wood shed

 

[fcurrier]

This is what's behind the woodshed:

One non speaking witness. What a story he could tell!

 

[dschwandt]

HOT COFFEE

Gotta love those grand-kids .

I was eating breakfast with my 10-year-old Granddaughter and I asked her,

What day is today?" .

Without skipping a beat she said, "It's Presidents Day!" .

She's smart, so I asked her "What does Presidents Day mean?" .

I was waiting for something about Obama, Bush or Clinton, etc.

She replied, "Presidents Day is when the President steps out of the
White House, and if he sees his shadow, we have 4 more years of Bull ****."

You know, it hurts when hot coffee spurts out your nose!

 

[rtunison]

A woman from Los Angeles who was a tree

hugging, liberal Democrat and an anti-hunter purchased a piece of

Land near Colville, WA . There was a large tree on one of the

highest points that she decided to climb.

As she neared the top she encountered a spotted owl that attacked her.

In her haste to escape, the woman slid down the tree to the

ground and got many splinters in her crotch. In considerable pain, she

hurried to a local ER to see a doctor. She told him she was an

environmentalist, a Democrat, and an anti-hunter and how she came to

get all the splinters.

The doctor listened to her story with great patience and then told her

to go wait in the examining room and he would see if he could help

her. She sat and waited three hours before the doctor re-appeared.

The angry woman demanded, "What took you so long?" He smiled and then

told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the Environmental

Protection Agency, the Forest Service, and the Bureau of Land

Management before I could remove old-growth timber from a

'recreational area' so close to a Waste Treatment Facility. And I'm

sorry, but due to Obama-Care, they turned you down.

 

[dschwandt]

Dad at the Mall
I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 92). We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time.
When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, 'What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?'
Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response, knowing he would have a good one, and in classic style he did not bat an eye in his response. 'Got drunk once, and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son.'

 

[dtanner]

Some good reasons to pace yourself lol.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=592838197466515

Hope this works lol.

 

[kostendorf]

 

[dschwandt]

Ooooff-Dahhh!!!!!

 

[aschumacher]

This is really on the weird side, since I have one of my own, I don't think it will be necessary to visit this museum.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/02/22/the-last-member-penis-museum_n_4825584.html

 

[jbaker]

What do you guys think of offering $250.00 (owner threw out 500.00 to start)for a johnson loader that was on a 1450 but has been sitting outside on a trailer for 3 years. all worked when removed from 1450

 

[thoffman]

Jeff,
GO FOR IT! All he can say is no and sell it to me.